Salesforce Acquires Your Mom

SCHENECTADY, NY-Salesforce announced today that it will be strategically entering your personal life by acquiring your mother (NYSE: MOM). Rumors of a pending deal surfaced after Salesforce started coming by your house for dinner more often following Parent-Teacher Association meetings.

“This is a match made in heaven,” Salesforce was overheard saying, in a private briefing at the dinner table. “Together, your…